ready?? ready?? yeah we ready??? uuuuuhhh maybe not!
So here we are… already, February, the 2nd month of the year and I just missed my 5month no post anniversary by 2 days!
It’s been a busy last few months, clearly too busy to write anything here, but I really need to find my discipline back. I was thrown into remembering my discipline these last couple weeks as I started my countdown to the really and truly duh duh duh dddduuuhh My Last Dance. I’m going home and performing for 1 last time on Queen’s Hall stage, with my family & friends as my audience… this feels like the right Last Dance, end it where it began.
But what I did not expect was that I forgot how hard dancing is… this shit is work!! who knew, it never seemed that way, it was that thing I used to do all day and all night and every living breathing moment to be good at what I did. But at no point did doing it feel like work, the eating healthy part considering I have a sweet tooth that will mash up Willy Wonka & his factory. I am quite proud of myself for the effort I am putting in moving forward with this big ass deadline of April 1st looming over me… I’ve actually been going to the gym …me!!! and i’ve been liking it, mainly because of my trainer, he knows his shit and at no point do I ever want to say – “idiot! i know my body better than you!” for some reason I trust him, I’m not sure if it is that I don’t know my body better because to be honest I don’t really recognise my body currently or because he is married to a dancer … but he will be the only reason I continue going.
This afternoon, I went back to the Lyceum, and danced on that Lion King Stage again (yes! they love me & I love them, cause they are letting me rehearse on the stage for free!!) I remembered what it was like to have that good sweat where you feel it sitting right on top of the your buzzing muscles.
It made my heart full to know that I still could remember bits of that solo that was so long ago, but it also made it very weary thinking about how far I have to go to get this up to the place I want it to be to perform for my mom and my sis. I’m anxious about it, but really really excited. The pieces I get to perform are those that I performed way to young and needed life behind me, and now that I have the life, I don’t have the skill. typical!
I’m just gonna have to push through and hope for the best and most importantly hope for now injuries… cause ain’t nobody got time for that! I came home from a good 1st rehearsal and then after my shower decided to sweaty up myself again and look at the video, which inevitably led to me learning and refining in the living room at minutes after midnight. Clearly I have too much time on my hands and too much energy during the witching hours.
I am a lucky girl to be able to dance with my old Caribbean School crew. All I know is I want this to work and I want this to be good. It’s my Last Dance and it’s one that my family will be at. I can’t ask for more than that.
well some Ivy Kirzner boots would be great as well! now that I’m thinking about it. but that is the only more I will ask for.
Seeing I get to dance with my sister and for my mother one last time… wish me luck world!! i’ma need it.
walk good.
bless.
xoxo
